What colour are your winters? What colours have they been.? Mine have been grey and burgundy and solid blue. Grey for suburban snow, all slushy and polluted and sometimes, stained with dog excretions. No, the little kids cant eat it here. But they can eat it on my neighbors little hill, in her backyard, that we used to sled down on the plastic kiddie sleds from department stores, and these wierd boards with a string that you'd hold on to, or not, if you were good. They were kind of like "learn to snowboard" things, where u learn your balance. Burgundy because of my sweaters. I always used to hate layering clothes when i was a kid. My mom is right when she says, "I just dont get it. In the summer, she wears a little coat, when it's so damn hot, but in the winter she wears nothing." She doesn't realize that I just always wear the same things. some kind of top, jeans and corduroys, and jacket of somesort if im elaving the house, maybe this dull coloured zip-up sweater if im chilled in the house. Blue because of my snowboard and all the hip ski-jackets I see in sport shops.
I was thinking the other day, on the train, where did my childhood go? Why did I have to grow up so fast? My art teacher said, "it's like...when kids start out really early with things like ice skating and instruments, and are force dby their parents, or something, to be really good, their childhoods are taken away, like they cant be kids anymore. So, when they're adults, they're really immature. Creative types are also the needy types. I know some adults like those kinds." I'm a creative type, but I wa snever forced into anything, yet I have always kept up with art, at my own pace. So what am I like?
I always remmeber the littlest things, the wierdest things, my mom says, who also laughs when I ask her, "do you remember when" or someone will talk about somebody, and I'll say, "oh, was she the one wearing the blue dress at the wedding." No kidding, that actually did happen. I saw the girl for a moment, and that's how I remembered her. Do other poeple remember these little things too? I rememebr this one time, when I was a kid, I was in my little hiding place in my family room, in the corner close off by the end of the couch, by my toy box, and I accidently started swallowing a marble, and it was in my throat, fighting to get out, and i couldn't, and I was choking, and i was looking over the arm of the couch at my mom, who was on the phone, I remember, and I didn't wanna tell her, because I didn't want to get in trouble, or cause an uproar...no, it was because I didn't want her to get upset and freak me out more, so I decided to just swallow it, or something,and i was trying to swallow it, u kknow move it down my throat, and it wasn't working, and finally, it popped out of my throat, somehow, that, to me, was a miracle, and I didn't tell her baout it until a year later tor something like that.
I wanna let the kid out of me more.